I remember all my life

posted on 17 Apr 2010 17:59 by dhrammarat
"I remember all my life, raining down as cold as ice, a shadow of a man, a face through a window, crying in the night ....."
I woke up cos of this song, it's my sms's song (Mandy .. Westlife) I grasped my cell phone and look at my message, someone try to sent it at midnight and I read it already, someone sent it in the morning and that made me awake, but the special message was sent to me around 3 a.m. and that time I slept, in fact before I went to bed I want to sent message to him but I knew he was is countdown party and we say Happy new year 2010 on New year eve already, so I didn't sent anything to him but when I receive sms from him, I felt happiness cos he thinking of me although he hang over.
When I replied all of my sms, I continued to sleep again and out of bed when the owner room knocked on my door for serving my breakfast, oh !! great. After that I called him, persuaded him to travel here (he called me yesterday and told me that he came back to Pattaya already) and told him to take his friend with him too, he asked me to travel at Pattaya but I refused cos I didn't find some info. about Pattaya (and it inconvenient for travel there alone, but I didn't tell him about this reason) I confirmed to travel at Koh Larn and I think he is OK, but around mid-day he called me and say something I didn't understand (it was loud cos I'm on the road) I think he didn't understand when I said too. The only thing that I realized ... he just know in this time that I stay at Koh Larn already (Oh, why, I told him yesterday that I'm at the port and waiting for the boat to Koh Larn, what about his understanding?). I asked him "You don't come here today, right?" I don't know what his replied (my listening is very bad) but I told him "I have no problem, just want to know .. what you want to do?" and ... can't remember anymore, just know he didn't come here.
I ride motorbike to "Had Nuan" (Nuan beach) It was a little long way and I crying, I thinks nobody interested me or if it have someone saw me crying, I don't care (nobody knows, who am I). My thought is .. when I feel very lonely and I need him, he's never to be my encourage, it's happen twice, or maybe he is not my soulmate.
I think, my dresses was strange when I walk on the beach, T-shirt and long(arms) shirt, short, nake feet, cap, middle hand bag and camera (no one same me), take many photos and of course, take photos on myselve (sometime with big smile). I walk until almost the end of the beach and then lie down on the beach chair. My boss called me and asked me about my friend, so I told him I came here alone, he asked me all of details.. why my friend didn't come with me? why I'm not cancel about this trip? how about my trip? my room? my safe? ah ... I think I have the habit of this from my boss, (hehehehe) and you know? after I come back, he talked to me about this topic only a few sentences but feel very painful, but he told to my colleague that he is very angry on me, what would to do if my dad knows and if my ages only 20 he will hit me (the advantage of my 32 years old)
After I ring off from my boss, I called to my friend, the first was .. pick it up and said she is very busy and ring off immediately, the second .. didn't pick my phone up, so I crying again.. and felt.. Lonely.. I'm so lonely, I have nobody, to call my owwnnn   
I stop to cry when I heard the song "Wake up call" I set this song only him, he told me.. he bought package tour for going to Koh Larn and will come here tomorrow, and asked me where am I ? and.. pls sent sms to him cos he didn't understand when I told him by talking on phone !!!!!! (so, trust me, if we have chance to meet, I will take papers and pen with me, if we talking and can't understand we can use it for communicate, haaaaaaa)
Only that .. I'm enjoy again and ready to move on my adventure (a little crazy, it seem like I take my happiness on another hand, not good). I went to "Had Samae", "Had Tien" and stop for a while to go to view point, it's up for many stairs, but when I standing on the top I can see Had Samae, a little island in the sea and Pattaya city too, great ....
I came back to my room and kept everything here, took only motorbike key, room key and some money with me (remember? I lost my cell phone cos took it to swim with me), in fact I wearing swim suit since in the morning, I can go to the sea everytime that I want but yesterday when I go up from the sea, I had a headache so I fear to swim in day cos I must ride motorbike, therefore I waiting until the evening for swimming, but this time I'm well.
OK, watching TV .. listen music and dance .. listen Buddhist pray and went to bed .. waiting for the next day.
Good night and sweet dream

edit @ 17 Apr 2010 18:00:56 by เจ้าไม้ขีดไฟตัวน้อย